Ask A Dog Trainer: How do I help my rescue dog come out of their shell?

Q: How do I help my rescue dog come out of their shell?

A: Our natural tendency is to first feel really sorry for the rescue dog and for their past. And while this is a totally understandable and well meaning feeling that we give them, it does the most psychological damage to them in the long run, and here's why: dogs live in the moment, and they feel what your energy is projecting. So because sympathy and empathy are weak energies in the animal world, when you just feel sorry for them, they really don't know what to do with that energy, and they end up taking the leadership role because somebody has to.

The second thing you can do for your rescue dog is not shower them in unearned love and affection. The bottom line on this one is that love and sympathy and empathy - they're all great energies that we have and they're all natural human energies when we feel sorry for somebody and want to help them, but they're not energies that are strong in the animal world and end up leading the dog out of the process of the pain that it came from and into a place of healing. Of course we should let our dogs know that we love them.

But if we want to help them move past their rescue insecurities, we need to lead them first and love them second. The third thing you can do for this rescue dog is be confident and go for daily walks. Remember to set boundaries on the walks, because they need the discipline of knowing what they can and can't do, and that you're the leader setting those boundaries. This lets them know that you are in charge and you know what you're doing. After all, what they want is somebody to follow who will lead them first and love them second.